The original “Helicopter Mom”
I’ve been reading The Iliad and have been struck by its relevance to modern life – pretty amazing for a work that is over 2500 years old. Once you find a translation that you like and get used to the long lists of warriors (including background information on each), the gory violence, the repetitiveness and the elaborate similes, you find that compelling universal themes begin to emerge. Besides the big issues of the meaning of life, the role of fate, and the importance of a moral vision, there are amusing and insightful descriptions of normal human behavior. For instance, the Goddess Thetis in her constant watchfulness and ceaseless meddling to benefit her son, the great warrior Achilles, resembles the ‘helicopter Moms’ of today. {If you haven’t heard this term, it refers to those mothers who are always hovering overhead “with the ferocity of a red-caped, flying squirrel” to quote an internet definition (the site also has an amusing quiz)}. When I first heard this term at a parenting seminar I attended about 10 years ago, I immediately knew that I was one. I was guilty of dashing to school with the forgotten book or lunch money, helping a little too much with overdue projects and essays, running interference with teachers and guidance counselors; in the end, I think a little more hands-off parenting can be a good thing. Let them fail in fourth grade so they don’t flunk out in the first semester of college, maybe. At the college freshman orientation which we attended, there was seminar for parents on how to back out of their children’s lives, at which we heard the story of an irate mother calling up a child’s employer to complain about his salary! No one could match Thetis though, who actually appealed to Zeus, calling down his wrath upon the Greeks for a slight upon Achilles’ honor, causing countless deaths and a near-defeat by the Trojans. In the big picture, most of this backfires on Achilles, who, like all mortals, has to learn through suffering. It is this suffering which Thetis and parents across the ages long to spare their children, despite the best intentions, often causing more harm than good.
I can’t help thinking that other lessons from the Iliad, given the over-arching power of Zeus to pull the strings, controlling the little lives of mortals, could also be applied to our recent elections, but that can wait for another day.