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17th November 2007

To a friend turning 50

posted in Just life |

When I was a kid, I always hated Sunday afternoons, with each minute ticking by bringing me closer to Monday morning and another long week of school.  I remember feeling a kind of paralysis as I would resist any activity that might make my remaining time speed up.  So, I would mope around feeling the loss of each second, until the day was gone (and wasted).  It isn’t so much that I hated school as I regretted the lost freedom and opportunities, the vista of possibilities that, on Friday afternoon, the weekend seemed to represent.  Turning 50 has given me a bit of the same feeling.  Suddenly I am in the Sunday afternoon of life and I feel the same regret – why didn’t I do more, why did I waste Saturday morning sleeping; or now: why did I never go to grad school or learn to play the piano?  Tonight, many of us will be gathering to celebrate a friend’s 50th birthday, and  I was trying to work up a few words of encouragement – Life begins at 50!  Fifty is the new forty!— but the words that keep coming to mind are Marlowe’s  ,sorry, that’s Marvell, - see Elaine’s comment below – (‘but at my back I always hear Time’s winged chariot hurrying near.’)  Sounds pessimistic, I know, but maybe a sense of urgency is not the worst quality to take past the mid-century mark.  It might be what’s needed for me to make the most of that “Sunday afternoon.”  As for my friend, my sense of his life is that he will keep on doing what he’s doing and have none of the above regrets.  So, Happy Birthday, friend! Avante!

There are currently 4 responses to “To a friend turning 50”

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  1. 1 On November 18th, 2007, Michelle said:

    Happy Birthday J : )

  2. 2 On November 19th, 2007, Jackie said:

    All I can say is I never thought I would get this old, this fast. As someone who is NOT 50(yet), my sense of the preciousness of each moment has helped me appreciate them more. At the end of it all, I want to look back and see that I have laughed often, loved wholeheartedly, and given intensely to causes that matter to me.

  3. 3 On November 29th, 2007, elaine said:

    Margaret:

    Just happened to read and enjoy your musings about turning 50. Anyone achieving that milestone has had the same reaction. However, I couldn’t help but notice that your reference to a quote by Marlowe seems incorrect to me. I believe it is an Andrew Marvell quote from “To his Coy Mistress”. Just thought you’d like to know.

  4. 4 On November 30th, 2007, Margaret said:

    Elaine, you’re right, of course, about the poem and the poet. Marlowe was the one who wrote “Come live with me and be my love..” (The Passionate Shepherd to His Love), which has a very different tone! Thanks for pointing that out.

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